All throughout my life, I’ve been called a lot of things, but ordinary was never one of them. I’ve been called weird by the cruel kids in elementary school who follow one another like lemmings. I’ve been called fat by the prissy, young girls in my sixth grade class. And I’ll never forget being called ugly by the majority of guys I crushed on during my boy crazy years.
All of these names take a toll on a person. Years later, and I’m still effected by the labels I was given growing up. Maybe at one point I was all of those things or perhaps I started to believe I was.
But thinking back, the words that came from the venomous mouths of my peers, made me who I am today.
I am humble and understanding. I’ve made friends with the odd kids, the ones with no one to talk to because they were considered the weirdos. To this day, I will listen to people and not judge.
I get along with any type of person. I am intellectual and witty. I have an off beat sense of humor. I know what it’s like to be alone. And although, I’d love to go back and have a different experience growing up, I might not be who I am today-which is everything I’ve always wished to be.
I may have lost weight, grew into myself and gained confidence but what helped me through this was knowing I was never ordinary.
Like in my favorite movie, American Beauty, Angela Hayes says, “there’s nothing worse in life than being ordinary”.
via Daily Prompt: Ordinary<a href="http://Ordinary“>
So yesterday, between classes I decided to explore Whole Foods. I’ve been there many times, usually, when I have a lot of money to spend. It is difficult buying the majority of groceries at Whole Foods as a college student! But anyway, being that I can’t live without carbs, I ran straight to the pasta isle. I passed all of the absurdly expensive veggies packed in more plastic than needed, and made my way to the heavenly isle of pasta and bread. My eyes widened like a baby deer as I pranced down the isle. I finally came across an orange box. It was called Banza. I read the whole box because the bright highlighter orange attracted me. Turns out , the pasta is made from chickpeas. It has less carbs, more fiber and protein than my typical beloved pasta.
So I made this for lunch. It has broccoli, sun dried tomatoes, regular tomatoes, roasted red pepper and the chickpea pasta. I seasoned with salt, red pepper flakes and not even a teaspoon of Jalapeno olive oil.
The word symptom. It brings chills down my spine and turns my face red and warm. My heart drops as fast as it would while on an adventureland ride.
I am someone with anxiety. So without any doubt, I’m an extreme hypochondriac too. What is the worst thing to do as someone who suffers from this? Check the internet.
It seems like pure insanity how easily I can talk myself into a new “disease” or “illness” but I can.
An itch on my arm turns into me researching psoriasis until I convince myself I have it. An ache in my lower back turns into kidney failure. And being a woman just makes me think I have a lot more to worry about.
So just hearing the word symptom makes me nervous as if I’m waiting for some kind of diagnosis that never comes.
I’m always okay though. But living with anxiety and being a hypochondriac is something few people would understand.
I’m learning to live with it and calm down a little bit. Symptom…symptoms… then I’m on web M.d for hours learning about an incurable disease.
via Daily Prompt: Symptom